Cantrell,+D+wk+13

So, I've taken the professor's comments about my prezi as well as the comments from my peers and I decided to just start over. I'm still going with the idea of "finding Mr. Right", but this time I wanted to take the viewer/audience along with me through my thought process and truly defamiliarize myself from the pictures. I also wanted to create a context for the pictures and argument. I don't think my previous prezi was very much of a rhetorical situation at all, it was merely a story with a nice and tidy ending (which was cliche so unaffective). In this truly revised VSP I wanted to create a lot of presence and invoke pathos. "Presence refers to examples, metaphors, illustrations, anecdotes, extended analogies, well-known allusions, and detailed descriptions--all the traditional storyteller's tools--that put the message immediately before the audience and invite identification (pathos) with it" (84). Because my prezi is more of a story/argument than a persuasive argument I wanted to look at ideas from the critics that were relevent. One thing Ramage said in capter 2 was it is in Nestorian order that we find "the most important points in an argument in the conlusion" (85). This I think I definitely did.

I did a lot of lead up with the dilemma facing girls in our culture who are told to be strong and independent and simultaneously that love is all you need. I wanted to critique the "cultural readymades" in our society: princess being saved by prince (as denoted by the Kim Kardashian image, sleepying beauty picture, and snow white being carried by the prince) and strong independent woman (as denoted by rosie the riveter, and spice girls picture). I specifically chose these images because my audience of girls (age 13-25ish) would be able to recognize these images, and relate. I used Eisenstein's idea of montage to group images together for more effecacy. When I transition to the dilemma of waiting for this prince they say will come, I show the flaws with it. Then I continue my thought process and realize that none of my heroines in my novels just sat around and waited for their prince to come. They were strong and independent, but that didn't mean they couldn't attract a man into their lives. The next slide I show that you just have to move on with your life: help others, dream big and make friends. This is where Ramage's notion of "constructed identity" I thought came in. I tried to show my ethos, by using I, but I also wanted to invoke a sense of community, involving all girls in the audience using "we". I've taken the stasis approach where I invoke a question that "gives rise to a division among people and occasions a rhetorical act, in the form of an argument, designed to overcome that division" (103). My rhetorical purpose is to get people thinking about the messages society puts out there for girls, and how to resolve the conflict if you are a girl; they can use my thinking process/conclusion to help them.

5/6/12

The final revision has taken my VSP once again in a new direction, but this time, I'm rather satisfied with it. In this version I wanted to enhance my ethos as author/presentor (Faigley). I wanted the "perceived quality of the act's agent" (Ramage 91) to be great, and this happens when you are honest and consistent, and bring the story through your perspective and not just speak about something "out there" unconnected to you personally. This is my story that I want to tell: My desire to be like the heroines in my novels, and that we can learn from them about the path to love. They teach us the path to love is a process. I use image denotations of mine and some of my audience's favorite novel and movie heroines: Elizabeth Bennett, Jane Eyre, Catherine Morland and Anne Shirley. Two of them are Jane Austen characters, one is a Charlott Bronte character, and Anne Shirley is by L.M Montgomery. My audience has widened to girls, young women, and older women age 14-60+ due to the age range of women interested in classics and period drama movies. I identify with all of these characters and want to learn from them, and the goal is for my audience to as well. Young women who are avid readers of classic literature, or just fond of more modern day period dramas will appreciate the denotations of their favorite heroines, and the connotations that go along (Barthes). I wanted to look at Ramage's idea of constructed identity: "We construct ourselves based on available models and within the limits of that which we've been given. But, each of us has the capacity to reject some models" (42). Life might not hand us everything we want (we might be lonely, not get what we want, etc), but, in this story's case, the path to love requires you to take life into your own hands. If life gives you lemons make lemonade.

In terms of Shields I wanted to make sure the "story" had presence and coherence of images and text. I wanted to invite identification (pathos) with it (Ramage 84). The way I made sure this happen was taking the suggestion of the professor to backtrack through some images to save on pictures, and enhance the effect of them. A problem is presented then a solution: (lonliness --> meeting new people (Elizabeth Bennett), not getting what they want --> serving others (Jane Eyre) Dealing with unsuitable partners --> Reflecting about mistakes (Catherine Morland), and Worrying about future --> Discussing future with loved ones. I quote from Northanger Abbey about when a women is to be heroine a hero is thrown her way. I then loop back up to the top showing the montage of the four heroines with their "men". This montage of men was inspired by Eisenstein as well as Malcolm. My intention was "plucking the photos from familiar contexts and arranging them" (Malcolm) and what is created is "a gestalt in the mind of the viewer" (Eisenstein). Sontag inspired me with the idea that photos, individually or as a group constitute an interpretation of reality/the world. Not every girl will view the path to love this way, or see these particular heroines as their inspiration, but it's my version, and the audience I'm targetting will find it effective. I end with 'this is what I've learned: If these heroines can do it, so can I (but it's a //process//.)'

4/25/12 Presentations

__Justin Taylor-__ I thought his prezi was very thought provoking and good. His main idea was "Is destruction an inherently evil act?" The images used were really powerful and worked well with the text. I didn sense that sometimes I couldn't follow his thought train. Sometimes by using too few words you actually negate the effects of the correlatory images. I think this was what happened at times. I would suggest making the transitions a bit clearer, that is all.

__Nicole Wang__- She used a poem by Randall Jarrell, but I just couldn't read it all the way through the first time because she went through it too fast. I was confused at times about what the point of the prezi was until I later realized it was referring to a poem. It kind of felt like it jumped around, so if it could in any way be more linear the ideas might be easier to follow. I like the message conveyed though that people shroud their lives in illusions, and that it takes events of great magnitude to wake us up from life--the life as nightmare. I like that she finished asking the audience: "Do you run from it", "Does it change you/how?" and "Does it destroy you." Also the images that went along, the abandoned teddy bear and traumatic soldier image were good.

__Brandon Tarby-__ I think this was my favorite out of the presentations for its rhetorical message and process of conveying it. The idea is of a teen with problems running away, but discovering that his problems aren't so big when he's homeless, etc. Through faith/bible he found a better direction to go. I thought this a little cliche, but it could at least be expounded on. I like how he used the arrows going in all directions from the boy's head in the early picture and then later the one arrow pointing up. He referred to Malcolm and interpretive relationships. I like how in the prezi he retraces his steps back to where he started.

__Amanda E. Charles-__ I liked the idea behind this prezi a lot. She showed/talked about the readymades in place for dealing with stress in college, which are unbeneficial: drinking, the quick fix, the energy addict. It was cool how she just added the text to the images. Then she showed the more positive readymades college students can engage in: volunteering, sports, music, friends. I did think there were a lot of pictures though. I liked how she asked who are all the pills and drinking and partying really benefitting. She illustrated this perfectly with the street sign saying marketing one way, strategy the other.

__Rachael Ward-__ I had no context for the prezi not being a video gamer, so that was something she could work on. Also I thought the layout was pretty basic, even though it was very clean, neat and orderly. The colors went well with the video game idea though. To Live and Remember was the idea as well as positive emotions still existing while humanity still exists. I would suggest adding more slides asking and addressing your questions of immortality.

__Jason Frey-__ His prezi was based around a phony weight loss product. He had a specific audience in mind: overweight or needing to shed some pounds. He defends claim for product. How do we know it's the best? Well he shows us 3 graphs and that it's celebrity approved. Overall I thought it was well done and presented. I really don't have any suggestions.

__Jessica Allebach-__ Her question: Will you treasure everyday life? She creates a rhetorical act, and she mentioned Ramage's stasis- what should be done? It was a call for action: to treasure or not treasure your days. She went from You to me (her) which established her ethos/credibility. She struggles with it too, and answered question for herself. The pictures were well chosen and resonate with most college students. She talked about defamiliarizing too. I thought overall it was very tight and well done.